hetalianbae:

"You can’t ship that!!! They’re not even canon!"

image

bagoas:

same

(Source: laurengaybello)

sloth-grunge:

when your mom says she’ll just be a minute

image

freshman

(Source: methedras)

high-school-fling:

spicy-vagina-tacos:

freezerburnt-capsicle:

dontbeanassbutt:

boy, blowjobs sure are a mouthful

jeez, that pun was hard for me to swallow

penis

thanks for your contribution

tescosfinest:

shout out to people wondering what the opposite of in is

pau1y:

what if 911 called you

kurgs:

skeletongrazed:

skeletongrazed:

what’s the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with breast implants ?

one’s a crusty bus station and one’s a busty crustacean

#i’ve told this joke a million times and it NEVER fails

indigopeach:

So my awesome meatspace pal dreccleston tagged me for this and im gonna do it (doing the accent challenge i was tagged for too but that is coming later).

Replace with your own answers and then tag 10 people.

  • Name: Sarah
  • Nickname: i have none. no one has succeeded in nicknaming me anything that sticks. ever. 
  • Birthday: March 8th 1997
  • Gender: Female
  • Sexuality: straight, kinda (heterosexual and biromantic if we wanna get technical, although i still think it’s oversimplifying a bit)
  • Height:  5’5”
  • Time zone: Central
  • What time and date is it there: 10:41am/September 1st
  • Average hours of sleep I get a night: ehh… on average? around 7
  • Last thing I googled was: a picture of jason isaacs from 1995 (yes shh i know i wasnt born yet HES REALLY ATTRACTIVE OK)
  • Most used phrase(s): no worries (variants: no prob, relax, it’ll be fiiiiiine) 
  • First word that comes to mind: cathedral
  • What I last said to a family member: "If you can’t turn it off then I can’t and if you can then I shouldn’t have to!" (my brother wanted me to turn off a lamp for him instead of just turning it the fuck off himself because he wanted to stick me with turning off all the lights - i was be the last one up even though i wasnt using most of the ones he was)
  • One place that makes me happy and why: my lil spot just outside the basement of our mountain house. it’s perfect and beautiful and nobody ever knows where i am so ~*~perfect solitude~*~
  • How many blankets I sleep under: in winter i use like 5 (lizard blood) and in summer usually one to zero.
  • Favourite beverage(s): coffee, water, apple cider, good root beer, lemonade, mango juice
  • Last movie I watched in the cinema: gotg
  • Three things I can’t live without: music, alone time, food&water
  • A piece of advice to all my followers: if you think i dont wanna be friends with you THAT IS A LIE. approach me for friendship anytime and i promise i will talk to u
  • You all have to listen to this song: GUYS I JUST DISCOVERED DUTILLEUX -skip to 3:20 if you want the part i’m specifically recommending (it ends at 6:03)

Okay so I’m gonna tag some people… hm… chokocurry, candidlycara, hazelgracey, opheliaslostsong, bakaforsenpai, toomanyhannahs, samditch, thedoctorskhaleesi, doll-frakking-house, and pedrob23.